A few days ago my daughter told me that she and two of her friends have been talking and they would like to get a place together… moving out and renting a house.
I was initially in complete shock about this news… God alone knows why because I’ve been trying to prepare myself for the inevitablity of the event for quite some time. However, in the past couple of days of course I have slowly come round to the idea and accepted that the time is right for her to go off and become the marvellous independent woman I know she will be.
Since she told me I’ve pretty much been in panic stations worrying about how she will cope looking after herself and how she’ll manage to share space with two other young women who, whilst knowing her for many years have never so much as spent a weekend away together.
Also… I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m rather worried about how I’ll cope as well without her being here. Whilst I don’t want to stop her leaving home (who am I kidding… I want my little girl to stay with me forever!!!!) I’m wondering quietly to myself how I’m going to stop myself from calling every five minutes to make sure shes ok and worrying about her getting to work on her own and…
Jesus!!! I’m that pathetic type of Mother that can’t sleep properly until she home and tucked up in bed safely after a night out… how the hell am I going to cope when she’s not living here any more and I’m worried about how she’s doing???
There are tonnes of other things that I could sit and list that I’ll spend the next few months worrying myself stupid about.
It’s been just me and her for the last 18 years and this is just horrible… I wish I didn’t feel like this…